The Vital Spark

     In a book I read there was a retired school teacher that had lived longer than her friends and relatives. She explained to a young woman that had befriended her that she had lived as long as she had because she was "always curious to see what was going to happen next".
     Lately I have felt "stopped at a red light in life" and I keep thinking of that woman's attitude. How do you maintain a curiosity about life when things don't change? How do you continue to have a zest when it is the same day in and day out?
     My mother has been in assisted living facilities for a very long time now. During her time in these establishments I have met a lot of elderly people. Some have the spark of life and some do not...what makes the difference?
     Is it the curiosity that was spoken of? I don't really have an answer for these questions, I guess I'm looking for it myself. I know I feel like Paul did when he said that to die is gain in Philippians 1:21. But the other side is to live is Christ!
     Sometimes we have to stir our spirits to find the excitement of life. Sometimes our spirit needs a boost.~~~~

~~~~I've been considering this for awhile, I've talked to people and talked to God about it. I asked Lane to pray over me and when he asked what I wanted to have prayed I asked him to pray for me to have the spark of life and for it to never leave.
     Lane has told me that I am the most optimistic person that he's ever met, but sometimes even optimistic people need to get stirred up.
     Yesterday God impressed on me (after Lane had prayed for me) that the spark of life for me is in creating. I make jewelry, I crochet, embroidery, I bake, I write blogs, I enjoy photography, I grow a garden... all of these are in the creating realm and that is where the spark of life is for me!
     I do believe that each person is responsible to find their own spark, and now that I understand it more I can tell you that it's what makes you feel alive! When I walk into a bead store, my happy factor rises like crazy! Or when I see something beautiful to take a picture of I can't get my camera ready fast enough!
     Find what makes you feel alive, it may be spending time with other people, it may be hearing beautiful music, it may be in creating art...there are many, many sparks that God has put in our world and to enjoy the sparks that He has given us is to bring Him glory!
     I know it's a weird concept, we think we have to be praying, reading scripture or something "church like" to glorify God, but that's not true. He made us, He created us as individuals and if we enjoy His creation we are bringing Him pleasure and honor! Not to say that we let our passion overtake all that we are, everything in moderation!
      How often do you see a cook watching people enjoy the meal they have prepared, or how often do you see an artist watching people respond to their art? Everyone wants their creation to be enjoyed and God wants us to enjoy what He has created and He has created you and whatever it is that you're passionate about.
     When you find your passion and follow it, the spark of life will always stay alive in you.

Are you able? Are you willing?

     I had a dream last night about a person in my life. In my dream they died and I was distraught. I grieved for this person terribly. This dream helped me understand something that I was dealing with in my life. I have a person that has "disassociated" themselves from me for their own reasons, which would be a whole different blog subject.
     In my waking world I have been struggling with emotions that I didn't understand and this dream is actually a gift from God to me. Because of the dream I can understand the depressive thoughts that have filled my days, and now, I will be able to control the emotions or at least understand them and order the rest of my life to have a form that can operate around the sadness!
     We are such complex beings that we are not even able to fully understand ourselves. We are made in God's image, except God is way more complex than we are. We believe we understand ourselves so we should be able to understand God also....we are deluding ourselves. We don't even really understand ourselves, much less God!
     I didn't understand myself enough to know why I was so sad until I had a dream to show me. How can we understand God until we live with Him long enough for Him to reveal Himself? Are you able to sojourn with Him? Are you willing?

Repentance

Just thinking~
     How many of us don't do what God has given us to do because it seems too small? Or if we don't see the reward in it? God gave me something to do and it fits in that question, He told me to write something in my blog daily......DAILY! I have not been faithful to that.
     I have a lot of excuses but they don't really matter, what matters is that I have not been faithful to do what I was given to do.
     I regret my lack of obedience...more than regret, I repent! I will write something daily and I will spend time with God seeking His forgiveness for my neglect, for my rebelliousness and lack of obedience!
     What will you do about what He has given you to do?

Repentance ~ literally means to turn, is the activity of reviewing one's actions and feeling contrition or regret for past wrongs. It generally involves a commitment to personal change and the resolve to live a more responsible and humane life.

Mrs Mouse

     There once was a sweet little mouse, everyone that met her loved her! Mrs Mouse was older now but she had had a very full life and a full house! She had loved Mr Mouse until he was taken away by a big, ugly owl! During their lives together Mr and Mrs Mouse had raised four little mice until they were able to move into their own homes and have their own families. Mrs Mouse worked so hard taking care of her family. She worked to bring in food for their meals, she prepared the meals and then cleaned up after the meals! Mrs Mouse kept her family safe, clean and healthy! 
     All of the things she did for her family never bothered Mrs Mouse, she was a hard worker and happy to take care of her little Mouse family. As the years went by and her little family grew older and had their own lives they saw less of Mrs Mouse and she tried to not be too sad by that, it is the way of life. However Mrs Mouse had to move to a smaller home because she was no longer able to work so hard and not able to take care of her bigger home....Mrs Mouse adjusted to that and then she was moved by her family to an even smaller home. Mrs Mouse adjusted over and over as she tried to do and be what everyone else wanted her to do.
     Through the years Mrs Mouse gave up most of her possessions and freedom and was left with little of the things that most of her friends and family took for granted. She came to be isolated in her little home as she was not able to be out and about like many others in her community. 
     Mrs Mouse had 2 chairs in her home, one chair she kept especially for her only son that would return to visit her and she always wanted him to be comfortable, she also had 2 little beds so when her youngest daughter returned from a great distance there would be somewhere for her to rest and stay. 
     Mrs Mouse's kitchen wasn't used now because Mrs Mouse was too weak to prepare her own food, her world had become her bed, her wheelchair and her recliner where she could sit and read for hours, or occasionally drift off in a nap. She kept her phone close by but it seldom rang, life is lonely when everyone else has moved on from this life and you have not had an opportunity to make new acquaintances because you're confined by health issues. 
     If you know a Mrs Mouse, or even a Mr Mouse...try to reach out to them, one day it may be you that has a phone that never rings~ 

No Energy!

Sometimes  I wonder why God made us the way we are...why do I not even have the energy that people 10 years older than me do? Why can I not go and do all of the things I want to or need to?
     I can wonder, but what good does that do? I am what I am and it is what it is, to quote a popular saying.
     So yes, I have to pull back and rest sometimes when I'd rather be active but I am not in control so I work and live in the boundaries that I've been given, and try to learn to not grumble about it!
     I know some look at me and think I'm holding back or something, I'm not sure why they would think I wouldn't want to be active and I'm sorry if that causes others to judge me unkindly but I can't change it, if I could I definitely would!

Only Today~

Today only happens once, it will not repeat itself and the windows of opportunities that are open now are not guaranteed to ever be available to you again. So make your choices carefully! 

What are you going to do with this day?  

Life is hard~

Life is hard~

I doubt there is anyone that gets to go through it with no struggle~

Today I had to unpack a box that I had put away around 11 years ago~

Time capsules should be avoided!~

I went through things, some easy, some not so easy~

School pictures, report cards, and projects for my sons~

It always hurts to see their eyes in those pictures lose that excited glow of childhood~

The first years of school they are so happy! and then~

A few more years of life and the glow is gone and the smile is not sincere~

A mother's heart longs to protect her children, to have them always hold onto the childhood beliefs that life is fun!~

But life is not always fun~

All too early, children realize that parents divorce, friends betray, classmates bully, teachers criticize, the world demands~

Life is hard~